You Do Not Need A Baby
I am reading some blogs which held by lovely women. I cried when I read their sad stories. I imagined we gave us each other a big hug. And I said „Yes, I know, I know that pain.“ I decided to start to have my own blog. I got a big warm welcome from Elaine, Klara, Mali, Phoenix and Loribeth. I got many positive energy from your blogs. Thank you for your great blogs!
Yesterday I met my prof. She is a brilliant woman. I like her so much. She is in her 70’s and still teaching at university. I told her my sad story. Do you know what she said?
„ You do not need a baby!“
She does not have kids either. I asked her if she felt lonely. „Never, I have many friends. There are many organizations which help childless seniors. Never scarred to get older. „ She answered.
She told me her story. When she was young, it was important for her to be successful in career. She got her lawyer license in her late 30’s. The separation with her ex followed then. She was not young when she found her current partner. She told me „Children like young mothers. I know that from my students. Young teachers are always popular. So I decide to stay childfree.“
I do not know if there is a sad story behind it. But I see a woman who is very happy now.
Actually there are many women without kids around me. I was just blind and focused on my medical treatments so much. I did not feel they are around me. In the office I know at least two co-workers without kids. I have some homosexual friends, also without, in my family too. Everywhere….
It's okay. You have to focus on the medical treatments when you are doing them. That's the only way to get through them. I didn't see a lot during that time period of my life, but I used what energy I had to just get through each day. <3
ReplyDeleteI really like what your professor said. It is simple and profound: "You do not need a baby!"
Life is beautiful like that woman said https://infertilephoenix.blogspot.com/2018/08/beautiful-life.html
Delete(((Hugs))) back at you! Your mention made my day. :)
ReplyDelete😊
DeleteOops, I've been slow with my reading. I'm so glad you have been warmly welcomed. That's why we all blog!
ReplyDeleteThis is a lovely story. Once we stop treatments/adoption proceedings etc, we realise how many role models we have. I am glad you feel less alone now.
Thank you Mali. Bloging make me feeling better. I am so glad to know you all.
DeleteI am glad that you don't feel as alone anymore as in the beginning. It was the same for me: first I thought I was the only one who couldn't have kids. All my friends seemed to fall pregnant! Then, after the deepest grief was behind me, I realized there are many more of us, also in the real world, not only online.
ReplyDeleteThis is wonderful, that you have such a good role model in your professor. We don't always know the full story, but we don't always need to either. It is helpful enough to see that other women who don't have children are happy :-).
It really help me to see happy women without kids. Sometimes I feel sad because even I did not realize there are so many great women around me without kids. I mean I feel no one really cares about us.....
DeleteYes, it does feel this way, doesn't it, especially in the beginning. But I do think we take good care of each other in our little CNBC community... and I think that is worth a lot <3.
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